Welcome to a fantacy in which the 3D Morning Show at WMBD Radio 1470 AM in Peoria, Illinois is a bar and the hosts are regular patrons. (These tavern stories are just metaphorical tales.)

More Tavern Tales

WMBD 1470 Radio


The WMBD 1470 3D Morning Show

Tavern Episode 3

A liberal and a conservative walked into the bar.
Conservative: "What's the special today? "
Bartender: "Chicken fried steak – every day this wee..."
Liberal (interrupting): "I'll have the special and a beer."
Conservative: "I'll take the opposite!"

"Oh lord, here we go again," the bartender prayed under his breath as he served up the fare.
Lib: "My beer is too hot!"
Con: "My steak is too cold!"
A man eating Oreos in a nearby booth: "I had the special and mine was just right!"
Doctor from the dance floor: "Because we built this bar in the middle of the road, there is no power - everything is served at room temp."

"Luke warm is more like it – makes me want to puke," paraphrased the Bartender from his Sunday School days.
Conrad: "Let's dance."
Libby "Love too, so long as we don't offend these good fellows."
Cookie man: "I'm personally opposed to contortion - but I respect you right to control your own boogey."
One-man Conga line: "Everything in moderation; I've been known to two-step a little myself."

"…dance around the issues is more like it," muttered the bartender.
Ms. Radical: "But there's no music..."
Mr. Reactionary: "I thought i heard 'Yackady Yack'…"
Dipped in milk:/ "We used to have a singing bull."
Dance Doctor: "Now we dance to our own tune; but why do you always have to lead?"

"You are all insane," whispered the bartender.
"I heard that! Its not nice to call people names," whined the Oreo.
"That's right, You're INTOLERANT!!" screamed the Doc.
Inconspicuous man (doing the chicken dance around the silent jukebox): "Why can't we Dahl just get along?"

Note: This bar is open 24 hours. Dancing often takes place from 6 to 10 am.